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teaviathan:

KILL MY ENTIRE ASS
i’m lauhigng so fucking hard i can’t believe the internet and tru fans
do i tell her

"punkylentil maplady"

teaviathan:

KILL MY ENTIRE ASS

i’m lauhigng so fucking hard i can’t believe the internet and tru fans

do i tell her

"punkylentil maplady"

I am literally so disgusted with myself for having an aesthetic right now because as I am realizing, styles and aesthetics are things to be used tactically and strategically to communicate larger ends, and are not necessarily an end in themselves unless you are interested in a kind of self-absorption that I am utterly uninterested in as an artist

what am I supposed to tell my thesis advisor “I went to austria and decided to become a multimedia/performance/text artist/illustrator also I might never pick up a paintbrush again except maybe as like a joke ROLF”

what’s the point of making these images if I’m purely thinking formally when I make them but then I somehow expect to imbue them with Higher Meaning after the fact and if I’m really just thinking formally then why am I not abandoning the image altogether and going for pure abstraction????

what’s the fucking point

who cares about good draftsmanship other than other people concerned with good draftsmanship and am I okay with that being my audience???? no

do I have the balls to abandon representational painting: the struggle

we’re having a discussion about the conceptual possibilities of painting today and we’re discussing the thing Yve-Alain Bois said - that even after postmodernism we should not repeatedly herald the death of painting, because we shouldn’t conceptualize painting as a historical narrative or continuum or a linear development but rather as a “space of play”, a “game” and this is all very well and good

but as liberating as it is to say that painting is a space of play

it also means that it’s powerless

it’s declawed

it can’t make grand claims about Meaning or the Potential for Social/Political Change the way that maybe history painting was able to a couple centuries ago

I mean in a way it’s essentially consigned to self-indulgence

and that maybe the narrative or didactic or at all “meaningful” functions of painting have since migrated to film, or performance, or other forms of nonrepresentational art

and I’m just like

well darn diddly darn

are the skill sets I’ve spent the last ten years developing

not

actually

the skill sets I need to say the things I want to say

kill my entire ass